Before He Whispered Her Name
by Mmm.Bby
Summary: The Cullen family has left Forks. With Edward hearing the news of his beloveds supposed death, he heads to Italy hoping the Volturi will end his life. Little did he know that his actions were going to change his entire family's lives. Strong Language.
1. Chapter One – Accepting my Punishment

**Before He Whispered Her Name**

_Summary: The Cullen family left Forks after the tragic birthday party. With Edward hearing the news of his beloveds supposed death, he heads to Italy in hopes the Royal family will end his life. Little did he know that his actions were going to change his entire family's lives. With Edward and Alice no longer around, the rest of the family is forced to help the Volturi. Now, Jasper is back in his home town and runs into none other than the Isabella Swan. This is Jasper's story before and up to the point of reconnecting with Bella._

_Disclaimer: I own nothing of the Twilight Saga!_

_Warning: There will be strong language, mentions of rape, self-harm and violence.

* * *

_

**Chapter One – Accepting my Punishment**

It had been months since my family had left Washington. I hadn't left until a few weeks after their departure. I felt like I owed Bella a personal apology for not only ruining her birthday but for destroying her life, taking her first love away from her, taking her family and her best friend away from her. _Right. _Some best friend Alice was though.

I could still remember the morning walking into the house to only leave straight away, thinking that Esme and Carlisle were still celebrating their anniversary. How wrong were we. I wasn't for sure about my assumptions but the spike of lust and love coming from the both of them at the time of handing out Bella's gifts. I instantly put the pieces together and saw red. It just so happened to be the exact time that Bella sliced her delicate finger on that stupid silver wrapping paper. I was ready to spring for Edward when he heard my thoughts he tried to turn the tables on me, pushing Bella into the plates and causing the chaos and the allusion that I had lost control.

Oh I lost control alright. I was going to kill the bastard.

If only Rose and Emmett hadn't gotten to me in time, we wouldn't be sitting in this god forsaken castle right now. I would have ended him then and there. Then we wouldn't of had Alice telling Edward of a vision were Bella took her own life and he wouldn't have played the over dramatic teenage boy that had just lost 'the one'. When Carlisle got the call for us to go to Italy, per Aro's request, we knew it wasn't likely we would actually come out of that place alive. If we left it at all.

_But Aro had other plans for us. Aro was planning to punish us in a way that I didn't even believe was possible. We were never meant to be killed by the Volturi that day..._

Aro had surprised us with the knowledge that he could change vampires into humans. At first I was completely opposed to the idea... too bad I didn't have a say in the matter. Punishment for the family was a second chance. For some of us at least. I have to undergo the change first since I was so 'unstable'. Fuck I was only unstable because my wife of fifty years decided to go and fuck her brother.

A knock on the door, of my borrowed room in this damned castle, brought me back to the present.

I didn't answer to anyone, I knew it was Felix and I knew why he was here. It was time.

***

"Ah! Jasper! I feel so terrible about doing this to you young one but it is what needs to be done, do you not agree?" Aro's voice echoed off the stone walls in this torture area that was well used.

I could smell the blood from the last of they meal. The sick fucks got off on _playing_ with their food before eating. It was a disgusting thought. I once was some what like these monsters. Messing with my prey before finally breaking their necks so I wouldn't have to feel their emotions anymore.

"I do not see the point in this myself Aro but if this is what you see fit for my punishment, so be it." I spoke finally, my voice was emotionless and calm; weird thing for an empath. But, no point in provoking him in any way. He and his brothers had made the decision and they wouldn't go back on it.

Clapping his papery thin hands together once, "Good, good! We shall get started than. Please, lay down on the table Jasper. I promise you will be moved to something more comfortable before you awake." I did as he said while he continued to speak. "It will take three days. From what I have heard from the few people I have reversed vampirism from, they say it hurts. Please, know that I am sorry ahead of time for the discomfort you might feel."

_Sorry? Yeah right and I am sorry for trying to remove Edward's head from his shoulders._

I felt his cool lips press my neck for a moment, it was almost intimate in a way but remembering who this was, the thought was quickly pushed from my mind when I felt the familiar sling of venom. Moving to my wrists, he bite down just as quickly, sending more bolts of pain to shoot through my dried veins. I spotted a very upset looking Carlisle in the corner of the room. I felt the pain moving towards my chest, then one echoing thump sounded from the confides of my frozen chest, I gasped as the thumping grew stronger and my breathing became labored. Slowly I slipped into the darkness, listening to the thump that I assumed was my dead heart coming back to life.

***

I could feel my eyes wanting to open but I couldn't. I wanted to call out for someone, if to only know that I wasn't alone but I was afraid to. For the first time in such a long time, I was actually afraid. The pain in my chest was worse than I remembered the fire being. My heart was pumping much faster than it should have and I began to wonder if this was what it felt like when someone was having a heart attack. I could no long feel emotions or sense anyone in the room with me. _Did my family actually leave me alone for this?_ I hoped not but with my behavior as of late, I wouldn't be upset with them if they had left me.

With every labored breath and inhale through my nose, I could feel my lungs burns and the faint wheeze that made me sound like a severe asthmatic. It was painful and I wanted to wish for death at this point but I refused to let myself think of that. I could do this. I survived being a damn slave to a sadistic bitch and taken on hundreds of vampire newborns that hated my very being for bringing them into this world, I survived slipping on my diet and having to feel the pity and disappointment from not only my family but my mate, being accused of trying to kill the mate of my _brother_ so it would cover their on asses when I found my wife was being unfaithful and it was with my brother of all people. Hell. If I could survive the pain and torture from those things, this should simply be a walk in the park for me. Another pain filled day in the life of one Jasper Whitlock.

"_This is nothing new Whitlock. Suck it up and stop being a pussy. Fight the pain Jasper, it shouldn't be long now. Don't fuckin' give up. We will need you Jasper, your family and me and your sister, we will need you soon. But, most importantly, Bella will need you. Fight and come out of this stronger than you were before. Bring back Major Whitlock in all his fuckin' glory from you human days. We will need your strength brother. You can do this!"_

I was shocked by hearing Peter's voice. Though I knew he wasn't in the room with me. There was no movement or sense of anyone around. I was alone completely yet I still heard Peter's voice speaking to me.

"_You are never alone brother and I promise you that after all this is over, you will never be alone again. You will fall in love. You will marry the beautiful yet sassy women and she will give you the most beautiful child the world will ever see. The women you fall in love with will be your true soul mate and she will complete you in every way. Just hold onto that thought. Fight for whats to come."_

It was an echo in my mind; strong enough that I had forgotten about the pain I was in for a moment. Trying to turn the words over in my head, I lost focus once a fiery pain shot through my chest once again. The pain was too much this time and I quickly slipped into the darkness.

***

A cold hand brush against my forehead. It woke me from my unconscious state yet I still could not open my eyes. They were heavy and for the first time in well over a century, I felt tired. Physically drained. I wanted to sleep. I groaned when the hand moved from my forehead down to my shoulder and pushed lightly. The bell like laughter was familiar but it seemed almost weak to my ears.

"Jasper, its time to wake up." I knew the voice and the person it belonged to was not a person I wanted to see as soon as I woke up from these past days of pain. "Please open your eyes. I have always wanted to see your beautiful human eyes in person." She was whispering to me now as if she didn't want anyone else to hear what she was saying.

I turned my head away from the sound of her voice.

I didn't want to see her.

I didn't want to even speak to her.

Hell, I didn't even want to be in the same room as her.

But, being the mere human that I am now. I didn't have much choice in the matter, her still being a vampire and all. When the cold touched my cheek I flinched away from it. Causing a gasp to come from the immortal that was disrupting my peace and quiet. The cold was back and was cupping the side of my face. My eyes flew open and I met the red eyes of the girl I once called an angel. _Red eyes._ "Fuck," I gasped and tried to wiggle my tired body away from her touch. I hadn't actually feared red eyes since Maria, Nettie and Lucy had made me their target oh so long ago.

Grasping at the edge of the bed that I don't remember being there when I laid down before. Somehow I had gotten a good enough grip to pull myself away from the demon in front of me only to fall clear off of the bed and land on the stone floor with a grunt of discomfort. Alice started towards me and I began to shake my head. "D-don't. Please just leave." My voice trembled and that southern twang I had almost lost as a vampire was back and thicker than ever.

"Jazzy, I–." she started but I cut her off. "Leave!" I demanded in a weak voice.

A sneer took over her face and she leaped at me faster than I could blink. A slap was delivered to my face and she gave a shill screech. When the wooden door of the room cracked from a strong impact and it fell to the floor, framing around the massive form of my brother Emmett; I was never more happy in my life to call him my brother. He had her grabbed by the back of the neck and dragged her from the room. That was where Carlisle and Esme found me a few moment later. My cheek bruising, eyes watering and wishing that I had never allowed Aro to change me back into a human.

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**AN:** Chapter One!

I know it is short but most of these chapters will be. It would have been posted sooner but my laptop decided it wanted to crash, luckily i had everything backed up this time! ^^

So this is a short story so it wont be as long as _But A Whisper on His Lips_.

Anyways... Hope you enjoyed and leave me your comments and thoughts on it so far.

**XoXo - Jenn**


	2. Chapter Two – Unnecessary Deaths

**Before He Whispered Her Name**

_Summary: The Cullen family left Forks after the tragic birthday party. With Edward hearing the news of his beloveds supposed death, he heads to Italy in hopes the Royal family will end his life. Little did he know that his actions were going to change his entire family's lives. With Edward and Alice no longer around, the rest of the family is forced to help the Volturi. Now, Jasper is back in his home town and runs into none other than the Isabella Swan. This is Jasper's story before and up to the point of reconnecting with Bella._

_Disclaimer: I own nothing of the Twilight Saga!_

_Warning: There will be strong language, mentions of rape, self-harm and violence.

* * *

_

**Chapter Two – Unnecessary Deaths**

_**Previously:** That was where Carlisle and Esme found me a few moments later. My cheek bruising, eyes watering and wishing that I had never allowed Aro to change me back into a human.

* * *

_

Months have passed since we have been here. We are now two family members short though. The ever dramatic duo that was known as Alice and Edward, were nothing but lifeless shells that were most likely laying in the basement of the castle. I had seen them being carried from Alice's room the night she woke. Not only did she completely throw a tantrum because she didn't want to be human, she panicked because she was no longer having visions. I understood that she was upset and that she had no idea how to be human. She woke up with no knowledge of her human life to begin with and then she was fated to become something she didn't understand like the rest of us. But I must say that her trying to cut her wrists in a castle full of human drinking vampires had to be either the stupidest or the smartest things she could have done.

Either way she got her wish but I don't think she intended to take her _brother_ with her. Edward should have known better than to try and stop her. Alice had become irrational and extremely emotional the morning she woke up. We had tried to comfort her, though I hated her with my entire being, I didn't want to see her take her own life. Their eyes are what will haunt me the rest of my life. I watched as the guardsmen carried their bodies in their arms. They were completely limp and their eyes were blank, emotionless, cold.. dead. Every night I closed my eyes I would see those eyes and think of how it was somewhat my fault they were now dead.

If I wouldn't have reacted to them at Bella's party the way I did; we would have never left Washington and then Bella would have killed herself. Even though Edward was the reason for everything, I was the reaction to their actions.

***

Aro had called me into his chamber one morning, asking if I would allow him my hand. I sat as he took in my every thought from my memories of well over a hundred years. When he had released my hand the smile on his face had scared me. It was happy yet menacing all in one. Then he simply dismissed me with a wave of his hand. I wasn't the only one of my family he wanted to speak with, he called everyone in at some point in the day. It wasn't until the Denali clan showed up at the castle that I started to wonder what was going on.

Our family was made to sit in the chamber room while Casius ordered the guards to destroy our cousins in front of our eyes. The screams of the girls caused my chest to tighten and hearing the growls of Eleazar trying to fight to save his mate had my throat constricting. It wasn't long before the blurs of colors and white stone flesh stopped moving. The fire that was burning in the fireplace on the opposite side of the room had started to flicker black and purple before the movement stopped; it was because the guards were tossing the pieces of our family members in it.

We sat in near silence as the guard did so. Esme and Rosalie both sobbing into their husband at our lose of loved ones.

***

As the months went by, more of the vampires we had come across at some point in our lives had been brought to the castle and destroyed before us. And every time they were finished, Carlisle's calm mask would crumble even more. He had thought of the Volturi as friends once. After losing the Denali coven, the Irish coven and a small group of half-breed vampires that were true blood related brother and sisters; Carlisle's features had become almost murderous.

It was when Vladimir and his brother were brought in that Carlisle snapped. He cursed the Volturi. He screamed at them. He also threatened to set them a lite the first chance he got. Carlisle was not one for violence and this had shocked everyone including Aro and his brothers. We didn't see our father for a week.

Emmett had taken up to working out during the days while Rosalie was with Esme and Carlisle trying to come up with an explanation as to why the Volturi were doing this to everyone we had come in contact with. I knew the reason. They were power hungry bastards that were trying to take out all of their threats. The biggest one they had were now human, though we were never for overturning them, and the other half that would have liked nothing more than to off them and take the throne; were dead.

It was a day in May when Aro called me alone to his chamber. I was confused as to why I was not to bring any of my family with me but I always cried when I saw who was in the middle of the room being held down by Felix and Demetri.

"Jasper! I have a surprise for you." Aro sang when I entered the room.

When my name was said, the man that was wrapped in the vice grip of Felix's arms turned towards me. It was my brother Peter. My best friend and his wife were here to die because of me. I could feel the burning of tears begin to prick at my eyes. My mouth had gone dry and my throat was tightening on me.

My legs began to shake slightly as I came up to stand beside them. "Y-yes Aro?"

Aro smiled, "As you can see child, we have brought in your friend and his mate. What we don't know is, what to do with them."

"Do with us?" Charlotte sputtered. "W-what do you mean?"

Ignoring her he continued talking to me. "Through what I have seen in your thoughts of these two creatures have been nothing but good. Only feeding off of the dying or criminals that are out to only harm innocent people. They helped you escape the southern wars and have taken you in during the times you have slipped up. Though they have done their evil deeds as well. With Maria, same as you, Jasper."

"Okay..."

"What is their punishment?" Aro asked in a demanding tone.

My eyes widened. "W-what? I cant.. I cant punish them."

"Why not?"

I stuttered and mumbled, trying to tell him that I just couldn't do it.

"Tell me!?" he roared.

"Because they are my family and you have already destroyed enough of them!" I shouted back.

I noticed then that Aro and his brothers were smiling at me. Aro clapped his hands together, "I see the major is still in you. You were always so loyal to you and yours." At this point I wanted to punch him in the face. "Very well. They shall be punished as you were young one." Turning his eyes to my brother he spoke again, "Peter, you and your mate have an hour. Then I shall come to your room and do the change. Prepare yourself."

Casius waved his hands in front of him in a dismissing way. "Out with you. We have nothing further to speak of."

As Felix and Demetri walked us out of the chamber room Peter turned his head towards me. "Don't feel sorry or bad about this. We are on the right path, fate is still with us. Just remember, Major, she will be waiting for you."

That was the first and last time we spoke of what he told me during my change.

---

**AN**: Chapter two.

As always, I am going to ask everyone to tell em what you think. The first chapter of this story has already gotten 700 hits yet only 11 people review, which makes me sad. All I ask if for you to tell me what you think. Takes all of 60 seconds to leave a review and I do read every single one of them. Most of the time, if you ask me questions, I answer them as well.

So I am going to try and update this story by this coming Friday. By then, lets try to get the story to say.. oh 30 reviews? If it gets more than that before Friday, I might update earlier.

Anyways, until next time everyone!

XoXo - Jenn


	3. Chapter Three – DB&AC

**Before He Whispered Her Name**

_Summary: The Cullen family left Forks after the tragic birthday party. With Edward hearing the news of his beloveds supposed death, he heads to Italy in hopes the Royal family will end his life. Little did he know that his actions were going to change his entire family's lives. With Edward and Alice no longer around, the rest of the family is forced to help the Volturi. Now, Jasper is back in his home town and runs into none other than the Isabella Swan. This is Jasper's story before and up to the point of reconnecting with Bella._

_Disclaimer: I own nothing of the Twilight Saga!_

_Warning: There will be strong language, mentions of rape, self-harm and violence.

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_

**Chapter Three – Devil Bitch and Angry Carlisle**

_**Previously:** As Felix and Demetri walked us out of the chamber room Peter turned his head towards me. "Don't feel sorry or bad about this. We are on the right path, fate is still with us. Just remember, Major, she will be waiting for you."_

_That was the first and last time we spoke of what he told me during my change.

* * *

_

"You what!?" Peter shouted. "Are are fucking stupid or do you all just have a death wish?"

Casius was laughing out right at Peter's shouting. Of course he would, why a vampire would be affected by a human? I have come to realize over the past few months, that Casius is a complete psychopath. He thrives on power and has a blood lust unlike anyone I have ever met. The fucker was crazy and I was counting my days down until I could leave.

"We have brought in your old coven leader. Please do not get upset, as you know, we are destroying threats that will expose our world eventually." Aro spoke calmly with his hands in a surrender motion.

"Threats?" Carlisle spat the words. "You destroyed part of my family. My cousins. Eleazar was even part of your coven at one time. You destroyed them and I pray to god that he is real and that they know we had no idea what was going to happen."

Casius gave a loud, deep and gravelly chuckle that echoed in the stone room. "Are you actually speaking of heaven? So, the once immortal killer and monster believes in God and his heaven and hell. Tell me dear Carlisle, do you think your children are in hell for their sins?"

Narrowing his eyes, Carlisle locked his jaw shut and his nostrils actually flared in his anger. "What they did was a sin but I am not the judge of their actions. They may have had a reason for it, one that they didn't share with any of us... but if God is real, which I believe he is; then they will be judged as he saw fit."

"Spoken like a true son of a pastor man." Casius smirked making Carlisle bite down on his lip. "If it were up to me they would have gone to hell. I mean, really, not only did they commit suicide but adultery as well. Tsk. Hell seems like the perfect place for them."

"Silence Casius! We have other matters at hand." Aro scolded in his papery voice. "Maria is here, Major, and as before; you are the one to chose her fate. What you say?"

"Death," Peter spat.

"You are not the Major, are you?" Marcus glared at Peter which earned him the middle finger. "Jasper decides."

I looked at my family, knowing that they wouldn't like my decision. Especially Carlisle. He hadn't wanted to kill James when we did but he still supported us. I knew my answer for Aro, as did everyone else in the room. When I locked eyes with Peter I said it out loud. "Death."

The noise that Carlisle made in his throat seemed to echo in the room but I couldn't even look him in the eye right now. He knew my reasons for my decision and there was nothing he could say or do to get me to change my mind.

"Very well, you are all dismissed." Aro clapped his hands together and motioned for Demetri to walk us out.

Demetri had become a friend of mine. At first I hated every one of the people in this castle except for my family. Then the night that I had finally broken down. Demetri had found me. He let me talk to him, he let me cry when I needed to. He even let me scream and yell at him. And when I was finished, he would hug me and tell me that every thing would be okay.

He became another brother to me.

"I have to take you lot to your rooms at once. Aro doesn't wish for you to come in contact with Maria." Demetri said in his British accent. "If it were up to Casius, you would have had to stay in the room for every single one of the deaths. Which, I am sorry that you had to witness the ones you did. The brothers have not been on good terms with one another as of late. Fighting constantly... Aro is afraid that Casius is trying to overthrow him."

"Why would Casius do such a thing?" Carlisle asked. "I thought they had made an agreement when they formed their leadership that it was to always be equal rulings. Has Casius given any hints of this or is it just Aro being as concerned as usual?"

Demetri shrugged, "I'm not sure but if you actually think about it. It was Casius that wanted to do all of this in the first place. Aro was simply only going to punish Edward for telling Isabella but Casius said that since you, Carlisle, were the leader and allowed it to happen; that you all were to be punished. Aro had no idea as to why his brother asked to know of all your acquaintances until after he had brought in your cousins from Alaska."

"So, Aro had nothing to do with the fact that all of our friends have been killed?" Carlisle snorted when Demetri shook his head. "A bunch of shit that it. He ordered you and the guards to kill them!"

Stopping short, Demetri turned to face Carlisle. Even though Carlisle was human he stood his ground and the look that Demetri was giving him; would have had me pissing myself if it was aimed at me. "What you don't know is that the brothers are more gifted than they let on. Aro has told you his other gift. Marcus and Casius are extra gifted as well. Marcus can see bonds, mate like bonds, in people. He can also also rip those bonds apart or form new ones. Much like Chelsea's gift to manipulate a relationship of two people. Marcus' is so much more powerful then hers that he doesn't have to do anything special to the people, he can simply think what he wants to happen and it will. Chelsea's gift has failed before. Heidi and I am an example of that."

Demetri sighed. "The brothers don't want others knowing about their extra powers because they think it makes them special or something to have secrets. There is something that Casius can do, he has never explained it to anyone else, but he can manipulate people."

"How so?" Emmett asked.

"He can make people do what he wants them to. The person knows what they are doing but they cannot stop once he has made the 'order'. Casius has been doing it to Heidi and Chelsea for years. If it weren't for his gift controlling them, they wouldn't be feeding from humans. Same with me. When I can get the chance, I go to a small hospital and there is a doctor that supplies us with blood. Of course if Casius would ever find out that is how we feed most of the time... I don't want to know what he would do to us." Shaking his head, he turned and started walking back towards our rooms.

"Just be warned. I've been having this terrible feeling in my stomach these last few years. Casius is planning something. I just know it and I pray to god that you lot are able to be as far away from him as you can when it happens." Demetri whispered to us before parting down a side hallway that led to his and Heidi's tower.

* * *

**AN:** Happy Friday everyone! It's like, 1 in the morning for me and I cannot sleep again. I'm actually doing a lot of things right now. I am brainstorming about some stuff for _The Fire Burning_. I am also working on my first outtake for _But A Whisper on His Lips_ and just a hint, it is an Edward extra! Also, I am working on a Harry Potter/Twilight story atm. I do not exactly know what the pairing is going to be right now but I am working on it.

I am working with a girl that has messaged me about co-writing a slash story with her and I am thinking that I just might do it. It would be a Harry/Draco story. I am a complete sucker for those. I mean, cmon, Draco is one of the hottest Harry Potter characters. Ron being the hottest and then Oliver Wood then Harry himself.. anyways.

So yeah.

Review please. Hearing what you all have to say actually makes me want to write faster. Even the hate mail makes me smile. I have already had one person screaming at me in a message saying that my Jasper is OOC. I simply told her if she didn't like my writing then to not read it. She replied, "Gladly, F-Off." That one did make me smile.

Until next chapter lovelies!

**XoXo - Jenn**


	4. Chapter Four – ITILMM

**Before He Whispered Her Name**

_Summary: The Cullen family left Forks after the tragic birthday party. With Edward hearing the news of his beloveds supposed death, he heads to Italy in hopes the Royal family will end his life. Little did he know that his actions were going to change his entire family's lives. With Edward and Alice no longer around, the rest of the family is forced to help the Volturi. Now, Jasper is back in his home town and runs into none other than the Isabella Swan. This is Jasper's story before and up to the point of reconnecting with Bella._

_Disclaimer: I own nothing of the Twilight Saga!_

_Warning: There will be strong language, mentions of rape, self-harm and violence.

* * *

_

**Chapter Four – I think I'm Losing my Mind**

_**Previously:** "Just be warned. I've been having this terrible feeling in my stomach these last few years. Casius is planning something. I just know it and I pray to god that you lot are able to be as far away from him as you can when it happens." Demetri whispered to us before parting down a side hallway that led to his and Heidi's tower.

* * *

_

It was coming up on the one year mark of being stuck in this castle. I was to the point that I thought I was going to go completely insane from staying in the confides of these walls almost every single day. Of course Casius, being as gracious as he is, – please note my sarcasm – let my family go out into the open arena that was dead center of the castle and surrounded by the stone walls. We got some sun but not much. He only allowed for us to do this on the days he felt that the sun wasn't too strong or bright. If we're being honest, I knew why he stayed out of the sun.

After sitting in the castle for so long and in the same position, their skin was actually starting to crackle in places. All three of the brothers were like that. They seemed that sitting in their thrones all day meant something that makes them seem more important or something. I had gotten a close up look at the three before I was changed. You could see around their eyes and mouths, the cracks in their stone flesh that should have healed like most vampires but you could see that instead of their skin being smooth and having a polished finish to it, theirs' were dried up and rough looking like sandstone.

This passed week had been even harder on my mental health. I had gotten sick for the first time in a century. Of course it couldn't have been a simple cold, oh no, it was a full blown flu bug; body aches, fever, and the vomit that Emmett described as the kind that 'could have probably hit the far wall of the bathroom' if I hadn't made it to the toilet in time. It was the worst I had felt in awhile.

Although I did get to laugh at Emmett a couple days later because he had caught the same bug I had. When he was heaving into the trash bin beside his bed, I just smirked at him; he did the mature thing. Stuck his tongue out at me and flipped me the bird, too bad I just laughed a few moments later when he had his face down in the trash bin again.

Ever since last week though, I have been hearing things. Things that just make me think that I really am going insane. I would hear my bedroom door creak as if someone would open it, the sound of giggles would ring through the hallways but every time I looked, no one was there. I also felt as if someone was watching me. It wasn't just me having these things happen either. Rosalie said she was experiencing them too but she felt we should keep it to ourselves because if we told; then Carlisle would lock us up in some hospital.

Today I decided that I would just go into the sitting room and read one of the Civil War books that Demetri had gotten me this passed weekend. I was stretched out in the oversized armchair, my book in one hand and a bowl of potato chips was balanced between my thighs. The book was interesting at first until I got to the parts that I knew was coming; they always got things wrong. I would know. I was there when that general died. It wasn't the other side, it was one of his own men that was a young boy, young than me at the time; he was nervous, shaking and his aim was shit. That was all it took and he had accidentally shot his commanding office in the back of the head.

I had ended up falling asleep sometime while reading. A cool breeze was blowing against my cheek and I was startled awake when I felt something touch my forehead. I hastily rubbed my eyes to get the sleep out and looked around, only to see that the room was completely empty and the fire crackling was the only sound in the room besides my frantic breaths. I shook my head and set my book and bowl on the side table before standing and stretching my body. _Should have known better than to have set with my neck in that position, Jasper. _I thought as I rubbed my aching neck.

Walking around the armchair, I had just opened the sitting room door when I felt a cool breeze and heard the tale tell sounds of familiar giggling. I looked around me again, my heart beating so hard I thought it would beat clear out of my chest. At that moment, Peter turned the corner and he must have seen the look on my face because he jogged over to me. Pressing me hand to his chest he told me to calm myself and breath with him. It was only then that I realized I was on the verge of a panic attack.

"Jasper, are you alright?" Peter asked once my breathing was slowed but still not normal.

I shook my head, "Yeah, I mean no. I mean, god I don't fucking know." Shaking my head again, I looked up into his eyes. "I think I'm losing my mind, Peter. I'm hearing shit. I feel as if someone is watching my every step. I just woke up because I felt something touch me! It fucking touched me, Peter!"

Peter grabbed my arms that I was now waving around frantically at my sides. "Whoa man, calm down. You're not crazy. And you're not the only one this is happening to. It's all of us. Char has been hearing growling and curses muttered when she is the only one in the room. She swore that someone tried to choke her in her sleep the other night but I had Heidi come look around, she found no one. I know Rose has been hearing things. Emmett hasn't been paying attention it seems, or he is just hiding it. Carlisle and Esme are being taunted. I overheard them talking yesterday afternoon. Something along the lines of hearing a male voice that is very dark sounding, calling them pathetic and worthless. Saying that it is all their faults that every person they have had contact with is dead." Peter sighed, "Esme.. it is killing her Jazz."

"Is there anything we can do about this? Is it Casius messing with us? Like using his gift to manipulate us to think these things?" I asked.

"No Jasper. These things are really happening to us. I just pray to god that this shit ends when we get out of this place."

"I agree."

* * *

**AN: **Okay, so just a chapter that tells a little about Jasper in his castle days.

The next chapter will begin his five years up until he meets up with Bella again. I'm thinking I will do the chapters by the years. There may be a part 1 and part 2 for some of the chapters.

I also tried to work on The Fire Burning and damnit. I cannot get into that story again. Just please give me some time. I promise I will update it again at some point.

I will also be posting some Harry Potter one-shots sometime soon. Being without a car and having no way to leave the house has given me extra time to write random crap aka lemony Harry – Draco stories. ^^ Look for those soon if that is something you like to read.

Leave me your comments, I love to hear from you all.

XoXo - Jenn


	5. Author's note

Author's note...

Since the last chapter of _Before He Whispered Her Name_ I have gotten nearly 30 messages from people saying they were no longer going to read my stories. From over 300 alerts that the story had is now down to 28. Mostly people are saying that they are not interested and some are talking about how I never edit or proof read before posting. I asked almost everyone if they would continue reading if I would have everything edited and fixed but they all said no.

I know there are a few that haven't given me any negative responses and that want me to continue writing but as of right now, I don't think I am going to finish writing anything. I've been sort of depressed lately anyways and just reading all of this negativity toward my stuff sorta just put the final nail in the coffin so to speak.

As some people know from talking to me is that I had a really rough year last year. I had a total of nine family members pass away in the time of 2 months and I also lost a very close friend in April and then my best friends dad passed away in May. My friend that passed, her mom asked me over yesterday for a lunch and to catch up because we hadn't spoken since the funeral. I went over to her house and nothing had changed. My friend's shoes were still by the front door and her jacket still on the coat rack. And for a moment the thought, 'Ashlee is home!' popped into my head before I realized what I was actually thinking. So instead of having lunch with her mom yesterday, I ended up sitting on her bed with her mom crying because it finally hit me that she and everyone else isn't coming back.

I had call my mom to pick the kids up from their dad's house because I was such a mess. Then when I finally got home, I check on the kids and then opened my laptop and click my email inbox only to be greeted with all of those messages.

So, with all that rambling done I just wanted to say that I wont be posting anything any time soon and I am really sorry to those who did want to read. I guess I I will listen to one of the comment that said I should stick to reading the originals instead of trying to write my own...

-Jenn.


	6. Author's note two

Author's note two...

So, not only have a lot of you messaged me about being upset that I don't want to write anymore.. my big sister screamed at me. After talking to everyone on here, I know I didn't reply to everyone cause there were seriously too many messages to respond to, I came to a decision. Some of you already know it because I did reply. So... I will continue writing. But I will not be posting for awhile. I am giving myself some me/family time. I don't exactly know when I will post again but I promise that I will finish my stories. Hell, if I get that excitement for writing again, I might post the Harry Potter story I had been working on.

Just please, give me some time to let me get things back to normal.

-Jenn


	7. Chapter Five – Understanding Edward

**Before He Whispered Her Name**

_Summary: The Cullen family left Forks after the tragic birthday party. With Edward hearing the news of his beloveds supposed death, he heads to Italy in hopes the Royal family will end his life. Little did he know that his actions were going to change his entire family's lives. With Edward and Alice no longer around, the rest of the family is forced to help the Volturi. Now, Jasper is back in his home town and runs into none other than the Isabella Swan. This is Jasper's story before and up to the point of reconnecting with Bella._

_Disclaimer: I own nothing of the Twilight Saga!_

_Warning: There will be strong language, mentions of rape, self-harm and violence.

* * *

_

**Chapter Five – Life as a Human: Year Two 'Understanding Edward'**

_**Previously:**__"Is there anything we can do about this? Is it Casius messing with us? Like using his gift to manipulate us to think these things?" I asked._

"_No Jasper. These things are really happening to us. I just pray to god that this shit ends when we get out of this place."_

"_I agree."

* * *

_

We have been out of Italy for nearly three months now. All of my things that were left in our homes from all over, including Forks, were sent to our place in Colorado. As of now, I was living with Peter and Charlotte. Carlisle and Esme wanted to return to go up to Alaska and see if they could find some photos from the Denali's. They were both pretty torn up about losing their family members. Sure, it hurt me as well to lose such close friends as them but I wasn't going to mope around because of it. Call me an asshole for saying that, which Rosalie did; though she wasn't one of the people that was always harassed verbally and sexually every time she walked into their home. I swear those girl would have tried to fuck anything with a dick. Carlisle even had his moments of discomfort with those women.

Back to the living arrangements.. yeah. I don't think that living with any of the couples was a good idea. Of course since becoming human, Rosalie has been trying to get pregnant. I swear to god Emmett has the stamina of a fucking cheetah. They had been going at it about four times a day and at night, it was pointless to try and sleep when we were still in Italy. Rosalie was always a loud girl when it came to her intimate times with Emmett but the castle's stone walls made everything so much louder. Honestly, it was ridiculous how often they went at it. I had, at first, moved in with the two of them. I lasted only a week of sleepless nights before I called Peter and told him to fix up that guest room of his.

Though it wasn't much better here. Currently I was sitting in a small bar on the outskirts of the town because I couldn't handle hearing my sister screaming 'you like me riding you cowboy?'. That was my breaking point tonight. And the reason for my drinking.

I hadn't really drank much since I was changed back. A few beers now and again with Peter. I had a couple glasses of scotch with Carlisle in his study when we first got back home. Though when I was in the army I was hardly one to drink. The guys in my unit would always throw comments my way about me being a sissy and unable to hold my whiskey. That wasn't it. I just didn't drink. My uncle was a drunk and I got to see the full affect of it when he would burst into our house at night and throw a screaming fit about how my Aunt May was worthless. He broke things. And it ended bad when daddy had to physically throw him out when he got a little to rough around us kids.

I just didn't want to be like him.

Yet here I sit, a glass of whiskey in my hand and a bowl of stale nuts sitting on the bar in front of me. The lady behind the bar has been fluttering her eyelashes at me since I sat down here and I don't have any interest in her fake orange tan and makeup caked face. Her bottle blond hair was so full of hair spray that I don't even think she had any clips or pins in it; I think it was holding up in that giant bump all by itself. She looked like one of those Hawaiian barbie dolls except barbie _is_ plastic and this girl was just pathetically trying to be.

I knew I shouldn't have looked up again, because Miss Barbie caught my eye and pulled her cut-up t-shirt down making her obviously fake breasts practically pop out of her top. Sighing, I downed the rest of my drink and dug into my back pocket for my wallet. After fishing out a couple twenties, I placed them on the bar and headed for the door. I kept my eyes on my feet as I walked only turning once I was half way out the door to see Miss Barbie pout her hot pink lips at me.

***

"You should get out more son." Carlisle's voice rang through the speaker, "Have you thought about dating?"

I sighed, rubbing my hands through my hair and over my face. This was what he asked me every time he called and every time I answered the same way. "I'm not ready to date yet, Carlisle."

Carlisle gave a weird protesting noise from the back of his throat. It was almost a whining sound. "I know, but I just hate to know that you are alone. And before you go and tell me that you have plenty of company, I understand but what I am talking about is intimate company."

"Carlisle.. dad. I just. God, I have been going out with Peter and Charlotte to the bars and clubs and I have tried to find someone to keep me company even for a night but I just cant do it." I grunted out. He knew I wasn't the type of person to want a one nightstand but I was at least trying to do it for the family.

"I am just trying to help you son. You are far too lonely and you know how your mind can get when you are alone," he was trying to make me understand where he was coming from. I understood I just couldn't do that sort of thing. "There is an event coming up next weekend. I have tickets for the entire family to come and I was hoping you would join us."

Not this... every event that a hospital held was like a dating game Esme would play with Edward. He was forced into dancing with the girls because she hated to see him all by himself while everyone else had someone. It was that moment that I finally understood why Edward always acted the way he did. He was _alone_. In a house full of mated couples. He had no one until he found Bella. Now, _I _was the one that was alone.

"Uh..." I drug the sound out. "I think I need to get away for a bit. Maybe I should head to my home in Texas and see if I can start to fix the place up a bit. Maybe the boxes of photos are still in the crawl space, you know I had wanted to go get them before we left Forks but the sun was always too much of a problem."

Carlisle sighed on the other end of the line. "Of course, son. We all know you've wanted to do that for sometime now. I understand, take all the time you need."

"Thanks dad." I nodded even though he couldn't see me.

"Be safe."

I heard him move in his leather chair, getting ready to press the button to hang up. "Wait!" I shouted suddenly feeling like I really needed to let him know I do care.

"Yes, Jasper?"

"Could you um, tell mom I love her?"

"Of course. Good night, son."

"Night dad."

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**AN: **I'm not completely back yet. I don't know when I will be updating again but I just wanted to give this to you guys after all of the positive feedback you guys gave me.

I just want to say thanks to everyone that is supporting me and for all of the encouraging messages that I received. They have helped me. There are still things I am dealing with. My friend that passed away on Friday afternoon has no family but a few close friends and his brother, the brother is in prison and doesn't know if he can attend the funeral service yet. My friend's brother needs some prayer right now so if any of you could do so, it would be much appreciated. And for people who asked, the OD was accidental.

Well, you all know what to do now. Reviews make me smile so tell me what you think.

**XoXo - Jenn**


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